Yes, the list again. Down to two.

1. Alex Hayward. (Alexis). Tall-ish, brown (pretty nice) hair, senior. Kind of on the ‘loser’ side, funny, spontaneous. Totally inexperienced with girls.

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2. Way down here: Taylor Ackley. Though he’s just kind of a mini-crush. I love his hair and personality, though he’s kind of man-whore-ish. That bugs me. And he’s a bit full of himself. Ah-well.

9-12-08 to 9-14-08

•Some of the best days of my life•

You have no idea how happy you guys make me, my Three-pack Foursome. Without you and my big brother, I don’t know where I would be today

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So, on friday, I had Candace, Lea, and Katie over. But, let me get to the good part first.

We were able to stay after school, and hung around for a long time watching practices, then the parade. We also hung with Alex and Zack and Eric a little bit. Alex got impaled on a coke bottle and was bleeding everywhere. Poor kid. I wanted to kiss it and make it better. During the parade Candace and Lea, and I were with Zack, Alex, Eric, and Fred. Zack had his little brother, and it was so cute! They would imitate each other and everything. Zack looked so fatherly and amazing. That is when Candace fell for him. AWWW.

So then afterwards, there was the girls’ soccer game against Calais (they lost). We basically didn’t watch the game at all. Things we did do: haunted Jordan, Brandon, Alex, and Zack; got rejected*; got yelled at**; got dissed***.

*Rejection was by Taylor. We were helping him with his ‘girl problems’ and he did break up with his girlfriend. Then he was talking about how he doesn’t have a lot of girl ‘friends’ because they end up liking him, or he likes them. Jay was there and pointed to me and Candace. Taylor looked at Candace and was like: ‘I don’t think I like her’. Then he looked at me, backed up and held up his hands. I stalked off.

**My mother, the bitch that she can be, seemed to have a real bug up her ass that night. Here’s something I wrote about it: To my mother.

***Sooo. After the game, there was a bon-fire, and it was lots of fun. We were basically just hanging around listening to the crappy musics. We split off — Katie stayed with Molly and Kira mostly, Lea took off with Tyler *gag*, and Candace and I hung with Zack and Eric and Alex. At some point, I ended up with Alex’s jacket: it just got thrown in my face, so I put it on and was grateful for the protection against the fire (though the sleeve was blood-stained >.<). It actually smelled okay too. ^-^ Soo, it went on like that for a while. We were gonna to a Conga line too, but Alex backed out (prolly ’cause I was behind him Y.Y). At one point Alex and I ended up alone and we said a few one-word comments, then looked into each other’s eyes (I know, so cliché), stared for a few moments, and then he walked away. AHHH.

Then the moon came up. It was gorgeous, and soo romantic. Candace and Zack took off into the soccer field to look at it and I went looking for Alex, with the intent to invite him to come and see it with me. As I went up to him, he reached out and just ripped his jacket off me. I was so stunned that I just walked away and was pretty horrified. I told him that there were nicer ways and he apologized (sort of).

Then my mom showed up and took us away.

When we got home, we stole upstairs and stayed up until 3 or so, talking about guys, body parts, problems (cutting, etc.), periods, life in general, snogging, etc. At one point we just kept listing off guys that we never imagined having a penis, or simply couldn’t picture it. At one point, we got really talkative, but Katie was silent for the most part. We though she was laughing, but it turned out that it was the opposite. I know that you were upset and felt ‘awful for making us hear that’. BUUUUT: I think we might have felt a little worse than you. We felt so guilty and horrible because we thought it was something that we had said; some topic that we covered. I know that you will probably be upset because you ‘made’ us feel that way, but it was basically a full-circle of guilt/upset-ness. The end.

We also covered the whole thing of us liking different people. Lea (the one with most experience) elaborated on past relationships, and Candace and I made plans. *cry* I still feel left out on the guy-platform.

Sooo. Saturday, we got up at 8 and had breakfast. Then to work we went. We went through a half-gallon of paint. Paint? Yes, we splatter-painted a whole wall of my bedroom: black, red, another red, purple, and blue. I’m kind of sad that there isn’t more black, but I love it so much. After we used up the paint (about a half hour later), we painted each other and made foot and hand prints on the wall. I am black (earth), Candace is red (fire), Lea is purple (wind), and Katie is blue (water). It kind of fits. I am the relatively unchanging one (set in my ideals, etc.), Candace is the semi-unpredictable one — she goes against a lot of what’s been ingrained into her, Lea is the undulating one — she goes up and down, contained to gale-force, Katie is the one that flows along, though she has a lot of emotional waves (mostly happy-high-tides). So yeah, that was pretty much total crap, but sort of true.

We painted all over each other then left it for later. Also, they tried to straighten my hair, but the power went out when they were half-way through… *sniff sniff* After all of that, we headed to the football game. AND (omg) we had to stop so that I could shit in the woods. Okay, that is sooo not a good thing, but I can laugh about it now. My mother snapped again at the game. We hung around and didn’t really watch. Lea disappeared at one point and Candace and I went looking for her. My mom saw us coming and stopped us, interrogating us with all her might. I lied quickly: “I had to go to the bathroom again.” She seemed to believe me for the moment.

I got some coffee and Candace and I sat on this step-thing and wailed about our emptiness. I know, shallow, right? But yeah, a major thing. The night before is when I had really, really started to like Alex again. So, we were in the same boat. She was actually getting so desperate with all that suppressed, sexual energy that she said she might actually like to fuck Zack. She is a total pro-abstinence girl, so that surprised me, though I agreed (with my person). Really though, I’d be content with cuddling and kissing.

My mother at one point was talking to me and started kvetching so I started to walk away and she spilt my coffee, and that made me even more pissed because I hate being grabbed (usually; I actually don’t like being touched all that much). I left anyways, and my coffee just got spilt again, so I threw it away.

When the game was over, Katie had to run in and get stuff so I went to talk to my mom. She started lecturing me — implying how irresponsible I am. I yelled right back at her and walked away, glaring daggers at her. I warned Lea, Katie, and Candace that there could be some repercussions. The ride to drop Katie off was silent. On the way home my mother and I fought on and off and the rest was silence.

A few weeks later I broke it all down for my mother (basically the same as the link). She ‘didn’t understand’ and asked to have another chance. I mean, I love telling my mom stuff, and I will again eventually, but right now I think she needs to work on earning it back.

And then, well, school started (9-3-08).

My schedule wasn’t so fucked up afterall — it turned out perfectly.

The bus was running early, so I go there way ahead of everyone and discovered that a freshman was inhabiting my locker! Jesus fuck, can’t this school get anything right?

So yeah, not a whole whole lot happened besides that. I met this kid named Shane, who has the emo look down to a hair…. We ran through our classes like a normal, tedious day, ad moved on. They were all short, but I managed to get homework in nearly all of them. At the end of the day we all went to the gym so that we could see a show and discuss some policy stuff. When we were walking in Katie and I both saw Alex. I think that’s when it hit me again. It was all of the sudden and took me by such surprise; I thought I was over him, but no… It all came flooding back, way way more intense.

He grew his hair out again, and it looks hawt. He looks hot. There’ll be rants about this later…

So yeah, there was some juggling stuff and that was pretty dumb. Also, I met this kid named Taylor Ackley, and he’s a lot of fun (his locker’s next to mine and down). I think I might like him.

Also, that friday, Katie and I went to a dance, and it was awful. Several people think we are lesbians, and we got so rejected by emo-boy: “Access denied forever — like metal panties.”

Emo-boy became friends with Isaac really quickly, and at first we thought that maybe Isaac was a closet-gay and that was why he had lost so much weight. That would be amazing, but Shane denies it.

The day after my cousin went home, I had to have my wisdom teeth out. I was terrified because they showed me this ‘what’s-the-worst-that-could-happen?’ video. ‘Did you know that having your wisdom teeth out could leave your face paralyzed if they touched a nerve?’ ‘If a tooth is removed at too much of an angle, your jaw may be fractured.’ Great! Want a little bit of death and destruction too?! Thanks, thanks.

So yes, I went down there (had never met the doctor before), had an x-ray, and got put under. Apparently, when I woke up I was pretty insane. I remember one little snippet, but the other was told to me. I slept for a long time after they were done, and woke up a few times but went right back to sleep. Eventually, they had to get me out because they needed the room, and I tried to sit up. This is what I remember: I tried to sit up and my body felt like someone had put it in a can and shaken it around so that I was the consistency of jello; I couldn’t stay upright and kept falling over, hitting my head against the wall — laughing the entire time. They practically picked me up and carried me to the car. No ice packs were packed, though I was loaded with pain killers and novocaine. My mom filled my prescription for my meds and we drove away. We weren’t even out of Bangor when the pain hit me smack-dab in the face. I felt pummeled, and I also couldn’t feel my lower face at all. I started to freak out and was bleeding everywhere.

My mom tried to give me a pain pill but my rubber face wouldn’t do what I told it to. The water kept spilling out. I finally did take one and slept the rest of the way home. I guess when I got home I asked why my pants were wet (from the water).

It took a while to heal and my face looked like a balloon for 3 weeks or so. Ugh.

A few weeks after skating camp, my 19 year old cousin came up and visited and we had a load of fun.

My Nana turned 85 during that visit, and I began to really think about age again.

My Nana won’t be around to see my kids, and most likely my mother won’t either. My mom is 62, and I’m 15. One of my greatest fear in life is that something will happen to her or my dad that makes it so they can’t see their grandkids. I mean, in 14 years, my mom will be 76, and I’ll be 29 — I might not even be out of college by then if I have to go for a doctorate. Maybe I should pop one out right now? (Don’t worry, not a real plan). It just really frightens me to think about life without my parents, especially since that will come a lot sooner than most it does for most people. At most, my mom has 40 some-odd years left, and though it does seem like a lot, I’ll have that much more without her and my dad.

I wish that my mother had had me earlier, but I also and glad that she didn’t because I would never have met the people I know now, and would probably not be the same person (not that I’d object to a little change).

So yes, the day after I got home from Hope’s I left again to go live with some people I had never met. It took us two hours to get there (IN CANADA) and then my parents left. The family has two daughters (Kierra and Abbey, 10 and 6) and that was sort of fun — though Abbey is a mental case and was constantly torturing their cat. I also lived a week without internet! Amazing, huh?

So yeah, the whole reason I was there was for a summer skating camp, and that was a lot of fun — I got a lot out of it. For 3 days, (every other day) I worked intensely with my coach for 2 hours straight. I had uber blisters because a little over half of that time was all jumping: working on my axle. I used a jumping harness (something that looks a lot like a medieval torture device, but cruder: a wire with a handle on the end goes up to another wire and then comes down through a pulley and attached to a thick leather belt [around my waist]). I also ended up with a ton of bruises and scraped because I got too hot to wear my sweatshirt and then kept falling on my elbows.

I was sooo stiff, so we went swimming ever day, which helped a lot.

On friday, my mom came and picked me up and that was that.

I’m have to do this in a few different posts, kids

First of allllll! This comes before the thing at Hope’s.

I took an uberly boring summer health class. A waste of 40 hours of my life. Literally. Oh well, I got a 100 and that goes on my 1st quarter report.

Back to Hope’s stuff. I never did finish this because the internet was being crappy and the videos didn’t upload, and then I got busy and forgot. Soooo:

Hope and I went to PortCon ‘08 on July 4th, and it was fun, though some parts were pretty tedious. The plushie-panel was closed and we were so pissed. We basically haunted different parts of the hotel and watched the amazing cosplayers. Also, we felt terrible because Hope’s brothers and dad had to pay because they were with use — 25 dollars! — and then left 5 minutes later. We went and ate lunch at subway:

Then we went a’walking back to the hotel and I found my future wedding dress:

The rest of the con was relatively uneventful. We watched some anime and stalked (well, I did) this really HAWT guy. I mean, he was just so [pretty]. I hugged him three times. (He had a ‘free hugs’ sign, so it wasn’t that weird!)

Theeeeen there was a concert which was a lot of fun. I wanted to dance with hot, Leather Boy, and he kept looking my way (NO, NOT MY IMAGINATION) but I always chicken out for these kinda things.

After the concert/dance, we met a girl cosplaying as L, and she was really nice. We hung with her until Hope’s family showed up so we could go to the fireworks. They had already eaten, so we had to go hungry! Anyways, we had to walk two miles or so uphill (lemme tell you, fishnets + converse = brutal blisters) and we were way tired. Hope and I got a chicken finger thing and a fried dough each. Blech

We searched for a good place to sit and also were going to go on a train ride, but it didn’t work out. For a while we hung out on this really nice beach and people-watched, and looked at the sky.

Then we moved back a ways and settled on a hill that we all kept falling down. By the end of the night I was about a foot from where I had started and my fishnets were in my mouth. I kept getting weird looks because of my outfit…they didn’t know where I’d been.

Fireworks go here.

We drove home and got there really late. I snatched a corn muffin and Hope kept telling me to go to sleep — I wasn’t tired (and I didn’t sleep on the way home, actually!).

Phooosh. Next.

Yep.

Here’s that video…the Naruto/Sasuke one…

And the second part:

They are actually both guys…. ah, yaoi!

Well, let’s see. Yesterday I talked with Corey online for about two and a half hours… Me doing almost all of the talking of course. He wants to be a clothing designer when he’s older, and also was a hair stylist in Taiwan. That’s cool. He likes all colors and likes watching sports — football especially.

The only thing is that it’s really hard to talk to him because he understands very, very little English. I feel awful, but (as much as I would like to), it’s hard to build up a relationship with him because we can’t really communicate. Like Katie says, there has to be a physical and mental attraction, or it won’t work. I definitely have the physical attraction down — but the mental is hard since I’m building on rocky foundation. Maybe next year he will have improved?
I had this plan today (if it had only been raining) where we would go off and talk outside (yes, in the rain) and I would kiss him. Yep, that’s what ran through my head. We both agreed that kissing in the rain is amazing. Whee. Nice plan, eh?
Anyways, talking today, I didn’t really get to talk to him because Lea and Candace were there, and it was hard to talk to him because he seemed shy (since he has issues with English, it’s probably not easy for him to be with several people at once)… Poor kid. This is one of those times where I wish I could understand all languages. Fuck it.
Finally, I do have a picture!!! He was kinda wary of the camera and part of him got chopped off…

In other news, I think I failed/did badly on an algebra test today. Alas. [edit] I have weird karma thing going on; whenever I think I did well, I do bad, and whenever I think I did bad, I do well: 96 ^-^

In other OTHER news: I went to an orthodontist appointment (random) and he said that I have to have my wisdom teeth out in the summer, and that I’m doing really well with the elastics, and that I should get my braces off in august for sure — maybe earlier!

~Toodles
Chloe

Well then. Not a lot’s been happening… I think I’ll go play pinball. Hmm…

Worked on my paper like a mad woman today. 6 1/2 pages down. I didn’t do my latin translation though. Erg. Gotta take a shower.

Saw a thing about an alien. I think it is definitely fake. Pshaw.

Nothing has been resolved. That’s that. Maybe I’ll post a bit of my paper later. Ugh.